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哈佛成功ESSAY50篇之“小巨人,大世界”

荏苒柔木 Sat Oct 26 12:01:53 CST 2013 阅览2245 评论

我很矮,我才一米六五,好吧,一米六六,如果想要加深印象的话。美国人的平均身高是一米七八,也就是说,我比美国人正常的身高矮了将近15厘米,更不用说与那些篮球队员相比了。

我的身高很容易使我被隔离开来,它可以使我很轻易地在人群中被辨认到。这点让我很在意,因为我很不喜欢这个符号。在小学时,每到星期天,我都会看电视上的足球节目。我总是想象着我能像Chris Berman一样,用他在电视上解说足球节目的声音,来报道我们街区的足球比赛。但是不管我在家里小伙伴面前表现的多好,在下课后,学校球队选人时,“小个子”这个称号,永远都让我对球队望而却步。

转眼间,我高中要毕业了,但我还是在为我的身高焦虑。我去咨询了一位增高专家,带着一股焦虑的心情,我走进了检查室,我很担心,“倘若从此以后,我不长了,怎么办?我的社会地位和身份等等会不会因此受到影响? ”小学的时候,我梦想着Chris Berman能为我的一次触地得分做精彩的解说,这时,医生大步走进来。我因为紧张出了很多汗,我和妈妈安静的坐下来,医生给我们看我手掌的X光片,并告诉我们,我的骨骼在我17岁的时候已经都闭合了,我以后都不会再长个子了。

唉!在开车回家的路上,我垂头丧气地双手紧紧地握着方向盘。即使当我的朋友们都嘲笑我个子矮小的时候,我依然努力去取得好的成绩,去获得大学成绩单里面各种各样的荣誉;不管我获得了多少块跆拳道奖牌,我都永远是只有一米六高的并非真正意义上的运动员。我可以很酷,很帅气,但是我永远不会满足身高的条件。我多么希望有一天,有些人可以仰着头看我的眼睛,然后请我帮他去够在高处的东西。

说实话,我很难改变上面的所有问题,但是,我懂得了身高不能左右所有的结局。相比做一个没有人情味的高个子,倒不如做一个富有同情心的小个子青年。虽然个子不高,但我相信,我可以在其他更多的地方做得更出色,比如我智商很高、做事很有热情,我也可以变身为一名情感专家。

我竟然戏剧性地长高了一些,这使我的生活更加有色彩了。个子小当然也有个子小的好处。比如在我小学时,加利福尼亚经常发生地震,我的老师就时常表扬我能迅速卧倒并找到掩护。

那个时候,学校的财政吃紧,买的课桌都很小,所以经常可以看到高个子同学的脚伸到过道上。哈哈,这个时候,Chris Shim,被赋予了身高的优势,总是能很好地摆好自己在课桌前的姿势。凭借这点,他还经常成为躲猫猫游戏中的冠军。

林肯曾和议员Stephen A. Douglas辩论,一位全美公认的演讲家,在1858年还是民主党的领袖,也仅仅只有一米六二的身高。这听起来很滑稽,但是我印象深刻的是道格拉斯站在参议院的台子上。我就会幻想有一天,也会和一位总统辩论。(那天下午,这位戴着像灶台一样形状的帽子、瘦小并未剔胡须的男人跟我聊天对我来讲,是很受益的)但是,如果不是因为童年的时候天真地张大嘴巴睁大眼睛好奇地望着夜空中的星星,我也不会成为一名宇航员。或许那个时候盼着长个子,在失重的状态下,我还能再长一些。

虽然只有一米六六,演员Dustin Hoffman在《雨人》这部电影中仍然与Tome Cruise有很多对手戏,并且两次蝉联奥斯卡金像奖最佳男演员。一米六五的Michael J. Fox也经常选较高的演员来参与到他的喜剧片中,增加喜剧效果。

在NBA历史上最矮的运动员“Muggsy” Bogues只有一米六,正是这个身高激发了他的运动热情,也正是凭借这点带领他的球队进到巅峰状态(这也是人们称他“强盗”的原因。)他们的身高并没有给他们展现运动或艺术之美带来任何阻碍,而且永远不会。

我的身高有一米六五,我也曾经努力长高过,但是我意识到这个没有优势的身高并不能阻碍我进到参议院,身高也不会阻止我追寻成为一名宇航员的梦想(我甚至拿到了美国宇航局的申请表)。这个身高也不能阻止我导演电影,在跆拳道(甚至篮球)的比赛中获胜。这个身高,我可以尽情微笑、可以尽情跳跃、奔跑、跳舞、写作、绘画、助人为乐、做志愿者、祈祷,可以大胆表达我的爱,也可以无所顾忌,放声哭泣。

我能在打保龄球时突破100分,能唱Nat King Cole的歌,能背诵影片《蒂凡尼的早餐》奥黛丽.赫本的经典台词。我还能在六分钟内跑完一英里,也可以像一只身手矫健的小猴子一样跳舞,全神贯注地去看一本好书(虽然我没有本事一口气全部读完它)。对于身高,我已经想通了,即使作为被人辨认的标志,也只是我被人辨认标志的一部分,这并不会影响我。另外,我可以一直穿我最喜爱的毛衣,不会担心因为长高而不再穿得下。

分析

这篇essay沿着身高这条主线,告诉读者身高矮小对人的生活造成的影响。Shim使用的技巧在于让读者明白他是如何为自己的身高苦恼的,而且这个身高也对他理解自己在家庭、朋友和同龄人中扮演的角色起到了很大的作用。

这篇essay开篇即简单直接地说明重点。开篇的一句“我很矮”很明确地向读者阐明了这篇文章的主旨。

随着essay的进行,Shim向人们展示了他的个人感受和志向。他向我们提供了一个窗口,透过这个窗口展示他是如何发现自己不在长个子的每一个瞬间,这些瞬间也成为了记录了他成长在每一步的标志。矮个子的命运让他看到这个世界不美好的一面,但这并没有消磨他追求目标的斗志和信心。

他很好地诠释了个人的积极乐观的一面,并通过一种很有深度的形式传递给大家。另外,这篇essay不仅让我们了解到他对自己个子矮小的想法,也告诉我们他涉猎广泛的兴趣,从政治到航空探索,从体育到艺术。Shim不仅用事实告诉了我们个子矮并不会成为他人生的障碍,而且他让我们了解到他为什么会取得这样的成绩。

essay英文原版参考:

ESSAY2:”Growing Up”( 成长)

I’m short. I’m five foot five – well, five foot six if I want to impress someone. If the average height of American men is five foot ten, that means I’m nearly half a foot shorter than the average Joe out there. And then there are the basketball players.

My height has always been something that’s set me apart; it’s helped define me. It’s just that as long as I can remember, I haven’t liked the definition very much. Every Sunday in grade school my dad and I would watch ESPN Primetime Football. Playing with friends at home, I always imagined the booming ESPN voice of Chris Berman giving the play-by-play of our street football games. But no matter how well I performed at home with friends, during school recess the stigma of “short kid” stuck with me while choosing teams.

Still concerned as senior year rolled along, I visited a growth specialist. Pacing the exam room in a shaky, elliptical orbit worried, “What if I’ve stopped growing? Will my social status forever be marked by my shortness?” In a grade school dream, I imagined Chris “ESPN” Berman’s voice as he analyzed the fantastic catch I had made for a touchdown when – with a start – the doctor strode in. damp with nervous sweat, I sat quietly with my mom as he showed us the X-ray taken of my hand. The bones in my seventeen-year-old body had matured. I would not grow any more.

Whoa. I clenched the steering wheel in frustration as I drove home. What good were my grades and “college transcript” achievements when even my friends poked fun of the short kid? What good was it to pray, or to genuinely live a life of love? No matter how many Taekwondo medals I had won, could I ever be considered truly athletic in a wiry, five foot five frame? I could be dark and handsome, but could I ever be the “tall” in “tall, dark and handsome”? All I wanted was someone special to look up into my eyes; all I wanted was someone to ask, “Could you reach that for me?”

It’s been hard to deal with. I haven’t answered all those questions, but I have learned that height isn’t all it’s made out to be. I ‘d rather be a shorter, compassionate person than a tall tyrant. I can be a giant in so many other ways:intellectually, spiritually and emotionally.

I’ve ironically grown taller from being short. It’s enriched my life. Being short has certainly had its advantages. During elementary school in earthquake-prone California for example, my teachers constantly praised my “duck and cover” skills.

The school budget was tight and the desks were so small an occasional limb could always be seen sticking out. Yet Chris Shim, “blessed” in height, always managed to squeeze himself into a compact and safe fetal position. The same quality has paid off in hide-and-go-seek. (I’m the unofficial champion on my block.)

Lincoln once debated with Senator Stephen A. Douglas – a magnificent orator,nationally recognized as the leader of the Democratic Party of 1858… and barely five feet four inches tall. It seems silly, but standing on the floor of the Senate last year I remembered Senator Douglas and imagined that I would one day debate with a future president. (It helped to have a tall, lanky, bearded man with a stove-top hat talk with me that afternoon.) But I could just as easily become an astronaut, if not for my childlike, gaping-mouth-eyes-straining wonderment of the stars, then maybe in the hope of growing a few inches (the spine spontaneously expands in the absence of gravity).

Even at five feet, six inches, the actor Dustin Hoffman held his own against Tome Cruise in the movie Rainman and went on to win his second Academy Award for Best Actor. Michael J. Fox (5’5”) constantly uses taller actors to his comedic advantage.

Height has enhanced the athleticism of “Muggsy” Bogues, the shortest player in the history of the NBA at five foot three. He’s used that edge to lead his basketball team in steals (they don’t call him “Muggsy” for nothing). Their height has put no limits to their work in the arts or athletics. Neither will mine.

I’m five foot five. I’ve struggled with it at times, but I’ve realized that being five-five can’t stop me from joining the Senate. It won’t stem my dream of becoming an astronaut (I even have the application from NASA). My height can’t prevent me from directing a movie and excelling in Taekwondo (or even basketball). At five foot five I can laugh, jump, run, dance, write, paint, help, volunteer, pray, love and cry.

I can break 100 in bowling. I can sing along to Nat King Cole. I can recite Audrey Hepburn’s lines from Breakfast at Tiffany’s. I can run the mile in under six minutes,dance like a wild monkey and be hopelessly wrapped up in a good book (though I have yet to master the ability to do it all at once). I’ve learned that my height, even as a defining characteristic, is only a part of the whole. It won’t limit me. Besides, this way I’ll never outgrow my favorite sweater.

ANALYSIS(分析)

“Growing Up” follows the form of discussing a physical or character trait, and exploring its impact on one’s life. Shim’s strategy is for the reader to understand his frustrations with his height, a physical characteristic that has played a great role in the way he sees himself among his family, friends, and peers.

This piece works because it is to the point, honest, and straight-forward. The opening, “I’m short,” delivers a clear message to the reader of the essay’s main idea.

As the essay progresses, Shim reveals his personal feelings and aspirations. Hegives us a window into the very moment of discovery that he would no longer be able to grow. We are taken on a tour of what makes Shim tick. Being short has shaped and influenced his outlook on the world, yet it has not diminished his goals.

It is personal, yet remains positive. He recognizes both the benefits and negatives of his short stature and is able to convey them in a thoughtful manner. 

Furthermore, the essay not only lets us into Shim’s thoughts on being small but tells us his varied interests in politics, space exploration, sports, and the arts. Shim hasn’t just told us how his height “doesn’t limit him” he has shown us why.

注:essay出自哈佛大学成功ESSAY50篇的第一版。

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